Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Don't Give Up

My friend, Linny, at aplacecalledsimplicity.blogspot.com has a Memorial Box Monday post. I like Linny, her family, and the idea that we need to remember God's faithfulness. In the midst of life's adventures - whether you're entering into the adoption journey, waiting... raising kiddos who've been adopted, believing for a miracle, or waiting some more... it's imperative to know that God holds you. His compassion is boundless, and His love for you is unquenchable. I pray my memory of an experience some years ago will encourage you today.
living amazing grace,

It's happening again. I feel it. I see it. My strength ebbs away and fear surrounds me like a shroud. What can I do? Why is my life fading into blackness so thick it chokes out any hope? Anxious thoughts encircle me and I struggle to overcome them. Hiding in the only place I know I will be safe, I slip a warm blanket around me in the early morning hours, sit with my Bible and listen to the Lord.

Reflecting back twenty years, I was diagnosed with a severe muscle disease that wouldn't respond to treatments. It's grown progressively worse and now my physical limitations keep me from everyday activities. I can't lift my arms or stand up from a sitting position. I can barely walk with a walker, and many times I have difficulty breathing. How do I watch my husband, who works a full time job, come home to household chores I can't do? How do I look into my little boy's eyes and tell him I can't take him to the park or pick him up and snuggle?

I cry out to God, sharing my burdens, my desires. He brings me to His Word and to an encouragement He spoke to me long ago...

I remember that time - becoming weaker and having to go back in the hospital. Discouragement pushed me to my friend's house where I lamented my crisis. My friend suggested I phone Eddie, a brother in the faith. I called and complained, telling him how scared I felt about my muscles growing weaker and the pending chemotherapy treatments. As Eddie tried to console me, we both heard static on the line. A voice broke into our conversation and asked,
"Is there a Lisa on the line?"

I said,
"Yes. Yes. There's a Lisa on the line. Again static vibrated into the earpiece and the voice repeated, "Is there a Lisa on the line?" Wondering what was happening, I urgently replied, "Yes, my name is Lisa." Evidently the person behind the voice couldn't hear me, but what he said next bought me to tears...

"If there's a Lisa on the line, the Word says, 'Don't give up!'"

I sat there, silent - shocked. I pulled the phone away from my ear and looked at it as though I'd never seen a phone before. Vaguely, I heard Eddie yelling in the background,
"Did you hear that? Who was that?" Slowly putting the phone back to my ear, I told Eddie I'd call him later.
I needed to talk to God since He had just spoken to me.

Now that word of encouragement, perhaps from an "angel unaware," inspires me again. Curled up in my chair, I grasp for the God who intervened in a past phone call. I look to Him for comfort, strength and healing. All those promises feel so distant; yet strangely, I feel a presence very near. Pulling the blanket around my shoulders, I surrender in faith. I believe His Word. I will not give up.


Renee said...

This has touched me deeply today as I find myself at times filled with fear AND wrapping up in my wool comforter I affectionately call "Woolie". Taking comfort in its warmth and God's promises as I heal from uterine cancer surgery and cope with Lyme Disease and CFS. What a wonderful witness of God's love for you and for your friend to hear the voice too...Super!!
Thank you so much for sharing this with us.....

My MBM stories can be found at

Mom Of Many said...

OH sweet friend!! I love your story - God's complete faithfulness and spoken word to you...He loves you sooooo much and I am sooo glad that you are my friend!! LOve you!!!!

Kat said...

Sigh....beautiful...God's Hand was SO obvious...just beautiful....May He bring you peace, comfort, and may His healing hand lay upon you. He is so near....

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